How did that go so fast? Summer is pretty much over, in school terms if not in weather terms, and already I'm getting palpitations as I pull together all the various bags of uniform and realise that none of it fits. I'm convinced my kids are part plant; the sun seems to make them grow. Christmas holiday, not at all. Summer holiday, inches all round.
And it's funny, in some ways I'm looking forward to them going back, having them out of the house, knowing they're fully occupied every day and not having to book various camps and activities. But in reality, it feels like I'm the one going back to school. We're going to be back to military regimes every morning, homework after school, checking and double checking school bags each day, working out how to collect three different children at different times/from different places, deciding how many clubs and after school activities they're allowed to do...
It's exhausting even thinking about it.
But more than any of that, it's that they're getting bigger. Birthdays are milestones, but for me September has always been the critical month. Back to school, new academic year, everything more serious somehow. It's exciting, watching them turn into little people. Or, rather, big people.
But sometimes I miss the pre school days, the little bundles running about, happy to spend the morning sorting washing.
Then again, those were the days of sleepless nights and tearing my hair out when, once again, I got little or no work done.
Okay, back to school it is. Now where are all those name tapes?
Wednesday 28 August 2013
Tuesday 6 August 2013
So how do you cope with the summer break?
We're, what, nearly mid way through? So how are you coping? Who is keeping your children entertained? I've done a straw poll of friends and acquaintances and it seems to be a mixture of grandparents, holiday camps, favours and meltdowns.
As one close friend put it: 'I want my children to enjoy the kind of summers I did - long lazy days spent outside, learning to ride their bikes or something. And instead I feel like I am handing them over to whoever will take them just so that I can get to work on time.'
The truth is that summer is probably one of the hardest times on working parents. Christmas you can take a few days off. Easter, it's usually raining anyway, and the short break can be managed with some annual leave and a few activities. But summer? Summer isn't just a holiday. It's a lifestyle event. It's lifestyle magazine photographs of families lazing around together, freckly children mucking about in the garden with go-karts and home-made lemonade. Summer is when the stay at home mother comes into her own, with picnics and days out, all so much easier when the sun is shining. The working parent, on the other hand, often watches miserably from within their air-conditioned office, wondering if they've made the right choices.
'I always start thinking about giving it all up in the summer,' confides another close friend. 'And it's not just about the children; pre-children I used to spend summers wistfully thinking about going freelance so I could control my own hours and hang out in the garden. But having a family has just intensified this longing. I know it's not realistic, but I have such a yearning to be at home, putting on the sprinkler and watching my children lark about instead of packing them off to yet another activity camp.'
And holidays is where having multiple children can often complicate things further. 'We have a full time nanny,' one friend explains, 'but she's pretty much looking after our 18 month old who needs naps and routine. Our six year old can just about tag along, but our nine year old needs way more stimulation. I end up shipping in each set of grandparents for two weeks each over the summer, as well as arranging activity camps, otherwise I come home to find everyone climbing up the walls. Then my partner and I take three weeks of annual leave, and that pretty much covers it. But I don't know what I'd do without my parents and his.'
And that's with the luxury of a full time nanny. 'I get into work late throughout the summer holiday,' a good friend tells me resignedly. 'I send my two boys to an activity camp but it doesn't open until 8.30am and it's further away from the station than their school. In term time I'm on the train by 8.15am after dropping the boys off at breakfast club; during the holidays I have to get the 9am train. And I have to leave earlier, too, to pick them up. Fortunately my manager is supportive and I make up the work in the evening or at weekends. But I hate it. And I also hate arriving to pick them up and finding that they're the last ones there.'
So what's the answer? An end to the long break? Michael Gove, Education Secretary, certainly wants this. But would it really make things easier or would it just create many more shorter holidays to contend with? And would our children be better off? I'm not convinced. The truth is, maybe a bit of extra hassle organizing activities is worth it. Have a look at your chidlren. Are they happy? Are they enjoying the summer? Are they relaxed and carefree and learning new skills? Good, so stop beating yourself up.
'I love the long holiday,' a friend (who works long hours in an investment bank) tells me, without a flicker of irritation or guilt. 'I feel like I can almost watch the kids grow; they really come alive. They go to a wonderful activity camp that they love, and there's no uniform to worry about, no homework... I wouldn't change it for anything.'
Happy holidays...:)
As one close friend put it: 'I want my children to enjoy the kind of summers I did - long lazy days spent outside, learning to ride their bikes or something. And instead I feel like I am handing them over to whoever will take them just so that I can get to work on time.'
The truth is that summer is probably one of the hardest times on working parents. Christmas you can take a few days off. Easter, it's usually raining anyway, and the short break can be managed with some annual leave and a few activities. But summer? Summer isn't just a holiday. It's a lifestyle event. It's lifestyle magazine photographs of families lazing around together, freckly children mucking about in the garden with go-karts and home-made lemonade. Summer is when the stay at home mother comes into her own, with picnics and days out, all so much easier when the sun is shining. The working parent, on the other hand, often watches miserably from within their air-conditioned office, wondering if they've made the right choices.
'I always start thinking about giving it all up in the summer,' confides another close friend. 'And it's not just about the children; pre-children I used to spend summers wistfully thinking about going freelance so I could control my own hours and hang out in the garden. But having a family has just intensified this longing. I know it's not realistic, but I have such a yearning to be at home, putting on the sprinkler and watching my children lark about instead of packing them off to yet another activity camp.'
And holidays is where having multiple children can often complicate things further. 'We have a full time nanny,' one friend explains, 'but she's pretty much looking after our 18 month old who needs naps and routine. Our six year old can just about tag along, but our nine year old needs way more stimulation. I end up shipping in each set of grandparents for two weeks each over the summer, as well as arranging activity camps, otherwise I come home to find everyone climbing up the walls. Then my partner and I take three weeks of annual leave, and that pretty much covers it. But I don't know what I'd do without my parents and his.'
And that's with the luxury of a full time nanny. 'I get into work late throughout the summer holiday,' a good friend tells me resignedly. 'I send my two boys to an activity camp but it doesn't open until 8.30am and it's further away from the station than their school. In term time I'm on the train by 8.15am after dropping the boys off at breakfast club; during the holidays I have to get the 9am train. And I have to leave earlier, too, to pick them up. Fortunately my manager is supportive and I make up the work in the evening or at weekends. But I hate it. And I also hate arriving to pick them up and finding that they're the last ones there.'
So what's the answer? An end to the long break? Michael Gove, Education Secretary, certainly wants this. But would it really make things easier or would it just create many more shorter holidays to contend with? And would our children be better off? I'm not convinced. The truth is, maybe a bit of extra hassle organizing activities is worth it. Have a look at your chidlren. Are they happy? Are they enjoying the summer? Are they relaxed and carefree and learning new skills? Good, so stop beating yourself up.
'I love the long holiday,' a friend (who works long hours in an investment bank) tells me, without a flicker of irritation or guilt. 'I feel like I can almost watch the kids grow; they really come alive. They go to a wonderful activity camp that they love, and there's no uniform to worry about, no homework... I wouldn't change it for anything.'
Happy holidays...:)
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